Finding Balance & Building Community on Social Media with Joseph Rubelli

Brand Intentionally with Friends Podcast
Season 1 - Episode 3

The first episode was so nice, we had to do it twice! That’s why I’m back with Jospeh Rubelli, a video-content marketing expert with over 40,000 followers on Instagram.

On this episode we speak about finding balance on social media and building your own community – or as Jo puts it, his “tribe.” We also go on about our step-by-step strategies for growth, the mistakes we’ve made along the way, how Jo named his community (and the reject names), thoughts on business “manifesting” and more in this hilarious part 2 of our conversation.

In this Episode of Brand Intentionally with Friends:
  • The BIGGEST Mistake in Growing Your Following
  • Joseph’s 3-Step Engagement Strategy
  • The Gamechanging Extra Effort to Connect via DMs
  • Why Talking Head Videos Work
  • The Downside of Being Controversial or Viral
  • Social Media Pet Peeves & No-Nos
  • Trendhopping vs Standing Out
  • The difference Being a Business Owner & Content Creator

Dig into this episode filled with entertaining banter and our experiences building communities while finding balance for better inspiration within your own business!

Watch the episode below, join the conversation, and check below for the transcript and relevant links.

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  • Click to Expand Episode 3 Transcript
    Garett Southerton [00:00:00]:

    Last episode was so nice, we had to do it twice. So I’m back with video content marketing expert, Joseph Verballey. In this hilarious episode, we’re discussing work life balance while growing on social media. we’re talking about everything from our step by step strategies to our social media pet peeves and even the rejected names for Joe’s community. So sit back and get ready to dig deep this episode of brand attention to my friends.

    Joseph Rubelli [00:00:24]:

    And, you know, I have some key words that I use in my business all the time as a brand. You know, if you ask me what are the value that I sell for as a brand and as a person, One is impact. I want you to come to the page and walk away with either a tip of our confidence, feel like that you’re more confident when you came back or giving you that tips about business that helps you to replace that stress with strategy when I give you more of a business set. This is also the tagline of my agency replacing stress strategy. You know? It’s really about people come to me because they know the value of digital marketing, but they don’t know how to handle it always too much for them. So they come with me and they take my social media services or my content creation services or my branding services. another keyword is freedom. I want to be able to do what I do, but also at the same time working to live, not living to work. I love to travel, I love to meet new people, which is leading me to the next word, which is connection. And this is the whole point of social media. Social media for me is the place where I can give impact with my experience, my knowledge, and my perspective, and then make connection with new friends, new prospect, new clients, whatever that might be, and the expertise is what I deliver. It’s a circle that flows perfectly together. So when it comes to connection,

    Garett Southerton [00:01:41]:

    I think that’s really key because, like, I don’t need social media for my business. Right? I never did. I was also muted for many years, and I still had a viable business that was growing. it’s all about how you handle it. Right? So being on social media now, yeah, I’m not gonna lie and say, like, it doesn’t help. Obviously, it helps. Right? You’re you’re getting more exposure. Exposure’s gonna help. But my business was mostly referral based because I’ve been doing it since before social media was even a thing. You know, my face was just starting And that’s when I started, you know, coding and doing graphic design, and I started growing the business when I was in my teens. So I already had that filing in that referral base that I didn’t need social media. I still don’t need social media if I don’t want to do it. So it’s more about the community aspect. It’s more about making the impact bigger than money. I could save a hell of a lot of time if I had to say forget social media. But the whole point is I want to build that community. I want to help people see that, like, hey. This is possible for me to do this. If he can do it, I can do it. And I think that’s, like, really special because, like, when we talk about audiences, right, I call them my community. And something that I always notice that you do is you call them your tribe. Yeah. I think that’s, like, a special relationship that you’re building. Yeah. Well, it took me a year to find a name. I remember posted it on social media asking on story to describe How should we call you, like, what’s the name? The people were coming out was so set. Like,

    Joseph Rubelli [00:02:59]:

    the Joe Club, and I was like, that’s not like a strip bar. I was like, I don’t really like

    Garett Southerton [00:03:04]:

    It definitely sounds like a New York City strip club.

    Joseph Rubelli [00:03:07]:

    It was like, Joe Club sounds like an OnlyFans page, but I was like, no. Now the and tried came to me because I went to a PR event, and I was talking to a friend when she works in PR. We went to this beauty event in New York. She said to me, oh, wow. She went to a page and said, oh my god. I love your page. You have a really cool tribe. I’m so sorry. What did you say? Try. It’s I like this. I’m gonna use this. And then I said, I didn’t even announce. People made a huge announcement about it. I was like, oh, from today, we’re gonna call you. Like, there is my niche. You called me when we played together at Christmas. She went to my Instagram, and she lost TikTok. She’s re she’s like seven years old. She has all the dancing. We found we add ons family on TikTok. and then she went to my Instagram. And she was like, oh, Joe is very popular on social media. So these are all the Jojo Babies. And I was like, Jojo Babies is fun, but all in private. because they’re like, you know and then I was laughing with my friend. I was like, you know, can you imagine if you open for the gay community You call it, judge your baby, and say, yeah. It’s gonna be like a date inside for sugar daddy. It sounds like that sucks. It’s like, I can’t do it. So yeah. No. the tribe name is really important. I don’t think it’s essential, but I think people feel like they belong somewhere. If you give them a name and, you know, And also something I really value, and this is something that belongs to my brand as well. And I do believe their results in the output is how you put the content there. You know, if you’re a graphic designer, your graphic Saxx on your own page doesn’t really work. Same thing if you sell in video content, or if you have a video content expertise like mine and you’re editing is rubbish, it doesn’t really work. Yeah. Yeah. I completely agree. I do a lot of video messaging to the community. I will always go back to the comments, and I will send a video message to the person and say hi. I think that’s very personal.

    Garett Southerton [00:04:51]:

    I do that a lot, and I want to advise anyone listening to this. If you never try video messaging, audio notes, there are game changers to get people to connect to your content. There isn’t really any algorithm to the code. You just to be a human behind this trait. And authentic. Like, if you’re just gonna do it, just do it. If you’re just gonna say, hey. What’s up? Follow me or thanks for following me. Done or not. But if you’re doing it out of the intention of just do it. It doesn’t really work. Like, people can sense and feel that. I know, like, when you message me, I’ve listened to it. And, like, it felt like you actually sent me a message. Like, it’s not something that you just sent to everybody. You know, we talked about New York. We talked about, you know, you moving here and all that. It was, like, authentic. real conversation and had nothing to do with business at all. Well, this is one of those things. I don’t use automations

    Joseph Rubelli [00:05:36]:

    on my page. I use automation on some client’s content because that’s very transactional. So, for example, I work with like dentists, dermatologists, you know, I work with law firms. They are more of a service based business that is more corporate. So it makes sense to — — very personal. Exactly. So it makes sense to have those elements in place to be more automatic. But when it comes to my page, I would want to preach community and the importance of it on my page, and then you go to my DMs and you get a bot. That’s not for me. Mhmm. It never really worked for me. It works for a lot of people.

    Garett Southerton [00:06:10]:

    I don’t think that’s really aligned with me as a person. But work is work is subjective. Right? What does it mean that works. What’s your definition of that? Is your definition of that you’re growing your page, or is your definition of working actually connecting with your people to grow them, like, and act in an actual sense of, like, community growth? That’s a really great question because I believe

    Joseph Rubelli [00:06:30]:

    what happens to a lot of experts, a lot of professionals that use automations on their own page is to make sure you have that task ticked off out of your list. Mhmm. So that doesn’t always mean connection. So to me, sending a welcome message to everyone in automatic doesn’t bring any benefit to me. It’s not personal. It’s not relatable. I didn’t write it, so I don’t probably even see it because I didn’t write it or I didn’t send it. it’s a bot that does it for me. So to me, it just ticked the task off my list because I sent a welcome message. But probably that welcome message is not gonna get an answer. If it does, it’s a very very simple answer. So I would rather take time.

    Garett Southerton [00:07:11]:

    Maybe I don’t do it very often. Full transparency, I’m not sending welcome messages to every I was gonna say, let’s preface that just in case somebody does file you and they don’t get a welcome message. You don’t start getting this hate DM’s and everything like, screw you, Joe. You didn’t message me. Exactly. No. I don’t send them all the time because I find it difficult. Sometimes,

    Joseph Rubelli [00:07:28]:

    I always say to people, if you really want to connect with me, make sure you comment on my post. And I don’t say that because I need the engagement, but it’s more about because I go through the comments and I reply individually. So when I do, I often send a welcome message or I often say, Oh, by the way, thank you so much for your support. I did see that you’ve been commenting for the last three reports, and I did send you a welcome message. Here we go. So I always do that because that’s the way for me My engagement strategy, it’s very much going through the comments, then going to the DMs, and then going to their story. So I have a 3 step structure gy. Yeah. Well, I mean, people just message you for everything because they want something from you all the time now. Yeah. Exactly. If you see them in the comments actually engaging with even talking then you know they’re probably an authentic person. It’s funny because me and Dalia, @daliaforreels, for those who don’t know. Mhmm. We were talking the other day because there’s this big creator And I got a message from them that’s saying, like, hi, Garett. Love your content.

    Garett Southerton [00:08:22]:

    Typical marketing line. Right? And I sent it to her, and she’s like, oh, I just got 1 too, and she sent me the screenshot, and it was working for the same thing. So it’s like something that could have been authentic and real isn’t really that big of a deal because it what what’s the meaning of it if it it’s just sent to everybody? You know, it’s really interesting because I have a creative that I am a beat in between because I like the content. I just don’t like the person behind it. I feel the same way. Yeah. So there is this guy that I follow is brilliant. He has about 6 k 600 k followers.

    Joseph Rubelli [00:08:54]:

    I messaged him in person, and then he said I said to you, oh, hi. I sent you these specialists. Well, I don’t have time to reply to everybody. So — Oh. — you have to not expect an answer most of the time. Is that all great? The last video was community. I was like, great.

    Garett Southerton [00:09:09]:

    That’s genius. I was like, that’s fine. So I am follow. That’s the downside of of virility. Right? Like, you go viral or you grow your pace to a certain point. And then it’s not personally more, which I mean, I understand, like, you know, it’s like that that balance. Right? Like, yeah. In one way, that’s good. But in the other way, like, you lose special aspect of it. It’s really interesting to me because if you think about it, we’re always worried to get more people, but we’re not worried to keep the people that are there Exactly. Exactly.

    Joseph Rubelli [00:09:38]:

    Isn’t it funny how? Everybody wants to grow on Instagram to 10,000 followers, but they don’t worry about the other 9000 they already have it to make them feel that they wanna stay. because if people don’t follow you, there is a reason why you don’t get to take care. And sometimes people do the cane and follow on follow, there is Something that irritates me is when people with to me, it particularly annoys me. And you know what I realized? is when I still follow them because I generally did, and then they all follow me because they follow me until they get to a specific top like, for a specific type of following them, I noticed that too. I will comment to their page because I have my routine of engagement, and then they will comment to all my posts, but they don’t follow me as I wonder freaking blind.

    Garett Southerton [00:10:17]:

    I’m like, really? It’s funny because me and my wife have a this running joke where I only file, like, around a hundred accounts loosely. I I don’t even know the specific number of it, because I pay attention to Right? Every time it gets over, like, 120, 130, I just go back through it. Right? And I look like, who’s disengaged for me just because, like, I followed them And now, like, they don’t comment on my post anymore. They don’t they don’t show up. They unfollowed me because because, you know, they got to their number, so screw it. I don’t need Garett anymore. I’m like, but I really followed you because I really liked your content. And you just showed, like, true colors, like, that you don’t actually care about what you said in your content. Exactly. And it’s funny because like you said, it’s usually about people who are talking about community. that’s the type of stuff I connect with. Right? Yeah. People are talking about being intentional or impactful or community or whatever phrase they wanna use with it, I follow them back usually because, like, I love that. You know what I mean? That’s so dope. Yeah. And then they’re, like, unfollowed and, like, how is that intentional?

    Joseph Rubelli [00:11:08]:

    I know. It’s really annoying. And you know what? Whoever came out in 2015 or 2016, telling people that they need to have a really good follow following a follow ratio. And, you know, you need to have no more I wanna get that person I wanna punch you in the face because it’s just literally is the biggest BS ever. Mhmm. I mean, unless you have 7000 people that you’re following that you genuinely like, which nobody does. But, I mean, realistically, I have 1500 people that I actually generally like content about. So I follow all of them. You know, I have a social media manager in the past telling me, oh, well, you’re following you follow our following. It’s really bad because you have you’re following 15 asset Well, I said, I have an account with over 40 k people, and they follow 1400.

    Garett Southerton [00:11:54]:

    So I was like, my rate here is not bad first. Luckily, I don’t really care because I actually generally like these people. Exactly. And the other thing with me, though, I could generally like a thousand people. Right? Yeah. The problem is is my brain, the way the way I am, I have too much anxiety. I can’t follow mentally a thousand people. As much as that even if I would like to, I can’t keep up with that noise. I have a hard time keeping up with, you know, 100 to 200 people that I generally, like, try to — Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. No. It’s normal. I have such a hard time as it is. I don’t have enough time in the day to serve clients be on social media, make content to help people, and then also look at other people that I I I genuinely care about and wanna support. Like this is not enough time in the day. So I usually don’t follow people that are not active. So if you haven’t been active for more than 3 months in the page, I will probably follow.

    Joseph Rubelli [00:12:40]:

    And if you have if I have an interaction with your content for the last 6 months or whatever, you know, if you don’t fall or if we follow each other some point that you don’t follow me anymore, I just will follow. But yeah. If you’re just trying to do the, you know, the follower game, then I don’t even wanna associate myself with you — Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. You know, I am terrible because I don’t really go through the list of my who I follow very often. So sometimes I might follow people for a long time, and I’m like, why did I follow this activist? It’s about 1 maybe I like one post, maybe I follow them. I’m like, wow. It’s talking about the importance of b in the planet. I don’t even have b content, do you mind? You know? Just hold on. Let’s see. Also, I have I don’t post on TikTok. and I use TikTok only for scrolling. Mhmm. I always say that I have the craziest algorithm there because I don’t really post anything. So it’s just really about Mia. So I get, like, tutorial. Get ready with me or, like, I have and I’m like, so it’s just random. So it’s my friend, and I would send you try to tick up So I only have one account. So it’s really bad. So it’s a mix between New York sightseeing, London sightseeing, Chinese apartment. They’re very tiny. So how do they are how do they so it’s really fun. Those capsule hotels, I find stuff so

    Garett Southerton [00:13:57]:

    fascinating. I mean, I’m a big dude, but

    Joseph Rubelli [00:14:01]:

    I can’t imagine myself being in in one that was slightly bigger. Oh, so I have a question. What is your guilty plea content that you consume when you don’t work. Oh,

    Garett Southerton [00:14:11]:

    I it is definitely YouTube, and it’s usually some type of gear whether it’s photography gear, tech gear, stuff I don’t even intend to ever buy. I obsessively want to see all the reviews. I wanna know all the tech. I mean, that’s, like, my childhood, like, obsession like this tech. Sometimes it at least to spending money on on shiny objects in general of things that you don’t need — Yeah. — with Gong. There is — — all of us. Right? So for me,

    Joseph Rubelli [00:14:40]:

    my content there is just not related to work that I love to enjoy. It’s a ranting content about celebrities, so I love to drama. God. I do love celebrity drama. I can’t let any of that. I do follow a few on TikTok. I am not interested on influencer drama. Never. I never watch any of them. There are Garett creators that I follow that I used to follow and I used find really interesting. But, usually, tumor stuff, a live very sarcastic humor. So when people are sarcastic, we follow that. I thought a lot of comedian, So in something I always do because I travel quite a lot, I will always speak inspirational work to go from TikTok. That’s always something and so I went to the out and jumped up story in London a few weeks back. It was fantastic. Have you ever seen out on John Live? Yeah. I took my mom for her birthday 1 year.

    Garett Southerton [00:15:32]:


    Joseph Rubelli [00:15:33]:

    Yeah. So I seen him last year at the Saks Fifth Avenue opening of the Christmas lights. He was a concert. I see him for free. So — Nice. Yeah. It was amazing. I was there. I was I went to Saks to get some shoes, and then the lady was like, oh, we’re close by 6 o’clock because Elton John is here. Is that Elton John is here? What do you mean? And he was like, yes. He’s performing outside. I was like, oh, sorry. I don’t have the tickets. So you don’t need the tickets. I said, do I know? that’s interesting. So so wait. If you wanna see her, I said, well, let’s grab a lot and and just me, Elton, shall we? So it was so funny. So, yeah, I do follow quite a lot of inspirational stuff to where to go on holiday, like, trips. I am so bored with people flashing how much money they have and many carriers they have. That’s just, like, oh, it’s so annoying. These life pastors — Uh-huh. That’s been since, like,

    Garett Southerton [00:16:23]:

    you know, the early Facebook days of people just taking pictures with their their money as a phone and — Oh my god. — and it’s funny because it always comes around tax season. Right? Like, they get their refund, and they’re like, oh, look how much money I made in my business today. No. You didn’t. Come on. Let’s be real. No. You didn’t.

    Joseph Rubelli [00:16:40]:

    Honestly, something that annoys the hell out of me. Let’s talk about something that I had it with on social. Okay? So manifesting. I was listening to a podcast, and they talk about the same thing. So I’m gonna quote these ladies because they are from TikTok, and they have this podcast. All I had podcast, so I need to quote them because that’s not for me. It’s not plagiarism. They mentioned it, but I do agree. And, you know, if you’ve ever seen this, like, people have in the very flashy range rover. the breaking back from her mask. 27 Rolex is the debut on DHK. And then, you know, And it’s like, oh, you know, this you see my life? I manifested it. I’m like, fuck off. If you go down to it, it’s just that you usually is. Either they don’t pay tax or they have a sugar daddy or they just have rich parents. Mhmm. Not just like, I had enough of this. It’s usually the last one. Yeah. What do you know what? I went to Starbucks with my friend. We were laughing about this guy, and then he he’s a pilot in London. And, you know, he used to do content about pilot stuff, about flying in planes, and it was really interesting. And then he shifted to being like an Instagram model. Uh-huh. So now his clover head to toe in Prada. I think if he opens his toe, it’s probably Prada as well. It’s Prada everywhere. And then it’s just like, his personality is Prada now. His Prada. You know? He and then he just very flashy hotels. and then he has this very flashy car. And then I was just like and then my first this is crazy. I you know, how much money does a pilot make? I said, no. I love money to have a draw a resume back. It’s

    Garett Southerton [00:18:15]:

    like, you know and to me, I’m like, really? What this is about? This is what you realize people you know, this what you are engaging with their ego on social media. It’s normally like that. It’s kinda going back to the Trend Hoping thing. Right? Where people would just, like, try and go on, what’s hot, — and try to be associated with what’s cool. So this pile is trying to be associated with Prada because Prada’s, like, in right now. It belong again. It’s and if you don’t want to belong somewhere, So what are your thoughts on, like, trend hopping versus standing out? Where do you think the the correct balance is into actually

    Joseph Rubelli [00:18:46]:

    build your own tribe. Great question. So it depends for your purposes. So I always talk about this. I divide my strategy on social media in different seasonal business, awareness, engagement, lead generation, and sales. So I divide my content based on that. Each piece of content has purpose. So if I am looking to gain awareness, I would probably jump on a trend because that allows me to usually have a shorter video probably 10 second max, put some text on the screen, and then put the value on the caption. And I know that video will generate more views, but it will usually have less engagement. But that video will allow me to reach possibly new people because it’s shorter, so it would be push more. Another thing is if you want to build your account quite fast jumping on China is a great trend. It’s a great way to do it. You I don’t do many trans personally, I usually do trend in sound. Sometimes, the problem is I am very slow to understand what a trend is for my account. I usually jump on a trend that is not a trend anymore, so it just doesn’t work. Mhmm. I do love token reels because to me, I always think about the experience I want my next follower see. So if I am going to an account, I want to see the person speaking. I want to see their authority through the carousel. I want to see what they sell, and I want to see if they are up to date with the trends of social media. So there needs to be an element for everything. I think balance is key. If you do — Yeah. — a content strategy where you’re posting maybe every day you can alternate having a trend, having a toy hero, having a carousel, static if you are pursuing, like, me three times a week. Just do what you’re best at for the most part. Yeah. So I do a lot of talking reels. I prefer them. I have a serious call on popular opinion where I just rant about social media, things that go in there. Love it. Yeah. So that’s usually what I do. And sometimes, You know what? I am very unpopular on this, but because I talk about video, I go live a lot. So live video for me is powerful. It doesn’t get a lot of views but it gets great engagement because people connect to it. People know I go like weekly. I haven’t done it as much recently.

    Garett Southerton [00:20:52]:

    But when I do go live, I try and set up, like, a second camera on side of me. And I record it because then, like, usually, there’s, like, at least a few gems, right, that you can sit there and you can cut out, and you could use it again and repurpose it for later. I think I’ve seen one of your video like that. I think I’ve seen it because it was on the side. And I’d rather do that so much more than trends because, like, I’ve tried to trend things, especially when I was posting daily. And, you know, because you gotta experiment. Right? You gotta you gotta always experiment and and try doing things in your business, and it just didn’t feel right. Like, I I made a few of them my own where I definitely did it differently than what other people were doing. But at the same time, like, it felt more exhausting to me to try and figure out how she turned and turned into me. then to just do me and make my points. And when I started actually making that shift and I started making more content with, you know, who I am the analogies. I know you pick up a lot of my analogies and, like, going about the taxis and traffic and all that sort of stuff. When I started using my analogies more, more people started picking up on that. and following me more for that than the trends every day. Yeah. I got I got less views. Let’s be honest. My account isn’t massive So my views are a lot different than what yours would be. But, like, ratio wise, like — It’s good. — a few hundred less views, but ten times more engagement and people actually connecting with me. And more so than just in comments, but in the DMs, like, hey. I really love that. What’s your perspective on that? Like, that’s what it’s all about to me. Like, making people think making people think outside the box to grow. Exactly. And it’s really about on the Sunday where the purpose of that car and is. And sometimes the metrics of that content that you look at are different. So, for example,

    Joseph Rubelli [00:22:28]:

    when I post car sales about my offer and what I offer my social media services, usually, they get less engagement. They do get less engagement than usual. However, they need to be there because on the experience of my next follower, I want them to know what I sell and what I offer. It’s really important if you’re a business because I treat my accounts as a business or I don’t treat it like an influencer. So my stories are a little bit more static these days, I post a lot of recent content because I realized recent content is more than just what people can skip it quite quickly. They can read it really quickly. And that’s how I usually do my strategy. I will post the same caption that I have on my video where I purpose out my story, and I will put some real life picture in the background. So if I’m going on holiday, you would see some picture. And that’s how I give you a hint of what I do behind the scenes. But it’s never really sometimes I do vlogs because I like doing them, I would love to post them on my feet. I usually do them when I’m back from a break, so I kinda give them a recap of what’s been happening behind seen. You wanna be there and show up for people too. You don’t wanna just — Exactly. — that’s why I stopped using automation in my social media. Like, I used to automate, like, my post post for me, like, so I didn’t miss or if I was busy, I didn’t do it. And then I realized the whole point of it for me is to really engage with people. Also, it’s accountability. when you’re there, you know you have to be there. Like, for example, I post, and I know I have to spend an hour there, and that’s the only hour I would spend. Another thing that is important is to make sure you have a very good balance between your content. You don’t always wanna make fritchard. You know, one of the most viral videos that I did, that was the only time I took a trend on action, and it worked quite well. I created a character of me, and I made it into the Titanic Music of the Bell. Oh, I remember that. I remember that. Yeah. So that was really funny because that was literally making a joke out of people getting worried over the Christmas holidays about their engagement. So that was really funny. And but that was a very good adaptation to a trend because it was about creating a character. And I thought, okay. So if I do trends, I will use this character to use them so I can take a joke out of it. So I loved that, and I think that was quite funny. But then again, do it once. You do it twice. You don’t wanna do it too much. So — Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No. It’s the same thing when people have a video when they’re controversial, and they just get really upset about something, then they’re upset every week. I’m like, come down. It’s social media. No brain surgery. Relax.

    Garett Southerton [00:24:52]:

    And it gets too repetitive. Like, if you feel this hot about everything, am I gonna feel about when I work with you? Oh my god. I’m gonna think you’re just gonna be mad at everything I do, and you’re just gonna make a rant about me on social media.

    Joseph Rubelli [00:25:03]:

    crazy. I just find that’s so annoying. And to me, it becomes white noise. White noise, just like the AI tools post. How many tools That’s a human being need for content. Every week, there is literally a list. I have saved a few Now I can literally write a book about how to find tools because I have so many. It’s just like how many tools do you need to content creation? How do many tools do you need for editing? And, you know, what I find really annoying is that most of the time these people don’t actually use these tools because I ask — — has. You ask him the comments, like, so I was thinking about switching to x. What are your thoughts on it? He goes, oh, well, I I’d never used that before. I you know, I just found the list of publisherships for people. I’m like, Oh. Yeah. You went on Google, sister.

    Garett Southerton [00:25:51]:

    And that’s another thing I hate. I hate when people just google some shit, put it in a post, or in a video and call it a day. Like, I could Google if I wanted myself. I wouldn’t be on Instagram if I wanted to Google top 5 video editors. I wanna know what your experience

    Joseph Rubelli [00:26:05]:

    is with a video editor or whatever the topic is. Exactly. And I wanna share something for anyone listening that is super important. You want to become an expert on your field, you want to become a resource of your information, but you also want to become the person they buy the solution on. Because if you already become a resource of your information, you are on one step away from Google. So what happens is when you’re posting too much valuable content, quote unquote, is that you become a commodity for people. So they’re never gonna buy from you because they know that next week you’re gonna share something for free again. So the balance it’s about making sure you are sharing content that is educating your audience so that’s a action to your offer. That’s the difference between posting as a business owner and as a content creator. Yep. 100% agree. So we know, like, on social media,

    Garett Southerton [00:26:56]:

    You gotta pop in. Right? You got everything going right for you. But what about that balance when it comes to offline life? Obviously, when you’re on social media, everything could be perceived as perfect. And we know that that’s not true. Right? We all deal with stuff. How do you balance, like, what’s going on behind the scenes

    Joseph Rubelli [00:27:15]:

    and trying not to let that affect what’s going on on live and in your schedule. I think, you know, it’s very easy to just show up in the best version of yourself, and that’s what we every everybody does. And, you know, what I’ve been doing throughout the years is to make sure I keep it as relatable as I possibly can that everything isn’t perfect. You know? Sometimes there is a balance that need to be respected, and I I have to work on finding that balance in the last couple of years. I used to be way more active all the time and be, you know, sharing. I’m someone who is very open about sharing. how I feel, and I share my gender mental health. But I also didn’t want the account to become a mental health account because that’s where people get turned off. So it was really a balance about understanding what is the right narrative for me on social to talk about what happening behind the scene. And I did go through a very challenging 4 months. At the beginning of 2023, I had a lot happening with my health. I’ve been diagnosed with a big degenerative disease in my eyes, so they really shock my word a little bit because I have to adjust and change and pivot to the way I live in the way I operate. So that was big, and I had an opportunity share, and I did. I did share it on my stories. But I didn’t wanna do a post about it because I didn’t feel like it was necessary yet, but I will in the future if I feel like it. So for me, I just go with my gut. I let my gut be my guide with things. And I don’t believe in oversharing. I don’t think your pace should become the place where you complain about everything that is wrong with your life. At the end, there should be a balance. You need to remember what people come there for. And sometimes it’s about making sure you let them know that there is a day that you’re not feeling yourself, and that’s okay. It happens. I usually try to be way more relatable on the ends when people be on private. I will say, oh, you know, I’ve been going through this and that. I will send message, and, you know, we will have a conversation about different things. On my stories, I will give a hint if people are interested, usually, they message me about it. And I don’t believe in oversharing. I’m a very private person. I don’t post my family on social media. I don’t post my partner social media. I don’t post any of that. And it’s really interesting when I talk about things because people say you’re the most active personal line, but I don’t know anything US have asked the illusion of consistency. You know? You’re always there, but, you know, I am more personal on my Facebook because that’s more like for my family and friends and etcetera. But, like, I know we’ll post. If I have people that are really connected on this, sir, and they will send me a Facebook request. But the balance, it’s about making sure you schedule your time online, you schedule your time offline. So, usually, most weekends are off social media. I don’t really I never on social media or Saturdays ever. I I need that break. And for me, I will have that time out of my day. It will be an hour or 2 where I will spend the line on my account, and I will make sure that I only do that so I only engage with the community and etcetera, and then I walk away from it. Those hard limits are really important. Yeah. It’s very important, and it’s really about leaving

    Garett Southerton [00:30:30]:

    to leave the moment, not leaving to post. That’s very important. I think that’s about so many people just can’t master. And I myself, I struggle with especially Instagram because that’s, like, my my community. I wanna be on there, like, 247, and then I know everyone’s done. And then it burns you out. And then it’s, like, a nasty cycle of, like, okay. Now I gotta get back to Instagram. I gotta get back to helping my community,

    Joseph Rubelli [00:30:53]:

    but I can’t because I can’t bore from the empty cup. There is literally a a very interesting study over any other day that 70% of people spend an average of 3 years on social media. Wow. That’s — Which is crazy. If you think about 3 3 years of your life on the screen, it’s crazy. So it’s really about understanding when it’s time to stop And another thing that is really interesting is that I’m very diligent with the time that I spend online. So, for example, when I’m how we work with friends, especially my best friend. My best friend is someone who is on social, but is not working on social. So he said to me, it’s really funny because you are the only person right now that works on social media. You’re very active on social media, but the only person that never picks up his file where we are to together because I never have my phone on the table when we have dinner or when we meet friends or when we have drinks. I’m very focused on the moment. I’m never on my phone. I usually am on my phone if this is, like, a very easy launch or something. But if I’m meeting friends and I’m cautiously

    Garett Southerton [00:31:52]:

    making an effort to me, You you wanna show up and be there for them. Exactly.

    Joseph Rubelli [00:31:57]:

    Well, I have friends in the past where they will literally be on on their front for the whole time as a as and, you know, posting the cake. And I was like, I will take a little, like, 10 seconds video on a place where I am, and then I will edit it late. I don’t have to go sit there. — or something. Yeah. You know, you capture the moment really quickly. You do you gotta do. But but then you’re being with the people that you’re You’re purposely there for — Exactly. — it’s really important to separate that balance

    Garett Southerton [00:32:21]:

    between work and personal. I’ve had a lot of, like, friendships where it doesn’t work out when they do that because then I feel so disconnected. I’m not gonna front. I’m easily put off. from people. Mhmm. If I don’t feel that you want a relationship with me or if I don’t feel that you want a friendship with me, I’m not gonna put the effort in on my side because I pride myself when I do something, whether it’s business or personal, I do it a 110%. Yeah. Exactly. I’m very intentional with my time. You know? We we only have a short amount of time to live. So if I wanna do something and I feel connected to somebody and I I wanna help them or I wanna be with them, I’m gonna be with them. But the second somebody really makes me feel disconnected or or unimportant, at that point, it’s kind of like, okay. Well, maybe we need to take a step back from being friends or hanging out, or we can be friends. — agree. online friends. I suppose it’s also what people are using it for. I feel a lot of people need their validation online. Mhmm. I am

    Joseph Rubelli [00:33:16]:

    very much of a person that I don’t need to post a picture of me to feel like I’m appreciated. I will post on our Facebook share a moment with my family that lives away or whatever. Yeah. And then let’s say, like, you know, if people like it, that’s Garett. But, like, I don’t need to pause for validate I always say this to the younger people that follow me is, I don’t look for your confidence on social media because you’re never gonna find it. When we meet up and we hang out, like, yeah, we plan on creating a certain amount of content or — Yeah. Of course. — just a little bit of content. But the rest of the day or whatever else we’re doing, gonna put our phones way, our cameras way, whatever. Yeah. Exactly. We’re gonna hang out, we’re gonna talk, we’re gonna catch up. We’re gonna be on that personal level. See, I’m terrible with these with things like that because I make quite a lot people in the community when we you know, I when I moved to the US, I have a lot of people in Detroit to live in America. So I met people in New York. I met people in Nashville. I met people know? And then I’m terrible because I never recommend that I do. I was like, I made this people. I didn’t never post it. And I’m like, why? And it’s like, we speak for, like, an hour. And I’m like, Wow. Literally, we mouse social media. We shouldn’t do not at least a picture together.

    Garett Southerton [00:34:19]:

    You know? It’s fantastic. But it’s great. It means that you have a good time. That’s how much you actually care. It Great. Thank you, Jo. Thank you so much for being on the podcast. Thank you for sharing. I know you’re a very personal person. You don’t share. You’re welcome. It has been the very

    Joseph Rubelli [00:34:34]:

    amazing chat, and it was a blast. We had a laugh. And, yes, you’re right. I’m very personal, but this is the right place to share. with you. I feel very comfortable, and I’m very excited about this podcast. I wish you the best luck — Thank you. — because I think it’s gonna be amazing. Where can people find you? Yes. So I am at Joseph Rebelli. You can find me on Isiran, which is where I hang out the most, but I am also on LinkedIn as well. You can follow me there too, and I also am the cohost of the digital boss’s podcast with my business partner, Claire. and you can find our show on Spotify, iTunes,

    Garett Southerton [00:35:12]:

    whatever you listen to your platform. Thank you so much. I have to give a huge thank you to Joseph Rubelli. It’s truly always Garett time talking to Jo. Not only is Yifan, but it’s also extremely educational. I hope you found a little inspiration to better your work life balance and managing social media for your business through this episode. You don’t have to listen to all the gruesome you need to do something rather than what feels right for you. And if you love this episode, remember to subscribe. I’ll catch you in the next one, but remember, Brian, intentionally.

About The Author

Garett Southerton

Garett Southerton (Garett®) is an Intentional Brand Strategist & Designer that has been a professional creative for over 18 years. He helps passionate changemakers impacting the world with their abilities through intentionality in visuals and strategy as a means to not only scale their brands, but to also cultivate a community where they can truly make a meaningful change while maintaining sustainability - making an impact without sacrificing an income.

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